Stuntin'

Blackberry Messenger Convo w/ Dad...

Me- Hey I got certified!

Dad- For accounting?

Me- No, for this

*Send pic file (Stunt Master card i got made at Chuckie Cheese this past weekend)

45 mins later and still no response, LOL.

Dear Douche Bag Engineer

Dear Douche Bag Engineer from work,

Thanks for having a long ass conversation in the middle of the hallway when you were literally 3 steps from your office. Now I look like the douche cause i had to interrupt your convo and walk between you and another douche bag.

Good things come to those who wait... and when i have enough time i'm gonna do something awful to your door knobb.

Happy 50th Bday Dad

Happy birthday dad... here's a video of me and Anne wishing you a happy bday... and yes I'm lip syncing

Sex Education

Better then K-Fed

Do you know how it feels to surpass one of your idols? I wonder if Allen Iverson felt the same way I feel when he crossed over MJ...

Well this weekend I realized I surpassed the lyrical skills of my former idol Kevin Federline. Case in point, lyrics from 2006's "hit" (hahaha shit I'm laughing just type that out) "Lose Control"...

"Don't hate 'cuz I'm a superstar and I married a superstar"

This idiot rhymed the word superstar w/ superstar. 'Nuff said. Reezy drops knowledge...

"Amazin, like a craisin... half cranberry and half raisin" ©

Conversations w/ Strangers...

1.) First day meeting the new guy from the Netherlands:

Me- So where are you from

New Guy- From the Netherlands

Me- So does that make you a neanderthal?

New Guy- .... nice meeting you (walks away)


2.) Buying dad's birthday gift from nice elderly woman from the jewelry store.

*Scenario- Pam (sales associate) was an uber nice lady who took the time to help me, Anne and Jane pick the best gift for dad's 50th bday. We had narrowed it down to 2 watches and suggested that I pick because I SHOULD know what my dad would like rather then the 2 girls

Me- Okay we'll go with that one

Pam- Great choice

Me- Yeah in most cases men are always right and women should just agree

Pam- Yes.... wait NOOOOOO.

LOL, I wish I could take photos of people's reactions when situations like this occur. This random picture from google does not do Pam's expression justice, but you get the idea.



3.) "Awesome"

*Scenario- My coworker's sister had this awesome t-shirt that a friend of hers had hand made w/ trini slang and sayings. Please keep in mind that everyone at this party was JUICED and i am very much anti-cancer

Me- So who made your shirt?

Coworker's Sister- Oh my friend who died of cancer

Me- Awesome

Jordan- Umm, NO! Not awesome.

Me- THE SHIRT THE SHIRT is awesome... not your friend dieing


4.) "Rockin' that shit"

*Scenario- I'm sitting at my desk at work when my co-worker picks up my ipod to ask me what I'm listening to

CW- What are you listening to?
*Picks up ipod and reads "Rockin' that shit" by The Dream

Me- *Looks up* It's a love song...

CW- *Puts ipod down and slowly walks away...

Are whores cannibals?

If a woman swallows when finished performing oral sex on a man are they considered a cannibal?

Back to the future...

Back from the future... i came to kill your pathetic blogs. I'm tired of reading crappy blogs and telling myself fuck i could do better. And then I realized I already had a blog.

Ensin Kim lay in a course for the nearest worm hole...

"Aye captain"

*Wormhole noises.... woorrooaoaoahhhhhhhhh vroooommmnnnahahahaha liinnnngga
(tell me that's not how a worm hole sounds and i'll ask you when the last time you were near a worm hole)